Time waits for no man

Tuesday 6 April - Easington Utd Reserves 3 Withernsea Reserves 2
Saturday 10 April - Phoenix Sports & Social FC (home) Won 4-0
Easington Utd Reserves 2 Wawne Ferry 2
Tuesday 13 April - Hedon Rangers Reserves 1 Easington Utd Reserves 1
(Easington win 4-2 on penalties)

Goal for Farny at the Farm

Along with pre-season, April constitutes my busiest time of the football calendar. Even more so when we’ve had a winter like that just experienced, adding to the number of midweek games to be played. Then there’s the admin side of things...

On Monday night, along with the other three Committee members, I took part in the draw for the annual South Holderness Cup competition. The effects of the winter were noticeable here too, with four teams – AFC Preston, Aldbrough, Roos and Skirlaugh – all declining the invitation due to a combination of fixture backlog and injuries.
Thus just five clubs (and nine teams) were represented at the draw, which was made at The White Horse in Ottringham where a decent pint of cask Banks’s Bitter cost me a not so decent £2.80!
The draw has once again set our first team on course for a potential meeting with holders Hedon Rangers, while Withernsea will fancy their chances of reaching the final from the other half.
Tonight (Tuesday) it was back to the live action, with the Elder Slushette and me attending the Reserves’ latest match in their rather improbable-looking run in the ER County League’s President’s Cup competition, the H. E. Dean Cup.
It’s a standing joke at County League Management Committee meetings – usually cracked by me – that “we don’t do cups” at Easington; hence I rarely take notice of any dates beyond the first or second rounds of the three competitions our teams are entered into. That’s suddenly changed and Saturday 22 May is starting to figure as a potentially important date for reasons other than the club’s Annual Presentation Evening! But I’m getting ahead of myself.

Fozzy (right) playing in his 137th Easington-Withernsea clash. He's won 135 of them!

Having disposed of Div 3 opponents Patrington while I was on holiday the format (consisting of a regionalised draw, with ties played on consecutive Tuesdays through April) threw up a meeting with local rivals Withernsea in round two.

"'Ave it!"

Coming three days after the Casuals had dished out a league beating to the Seasiders’ own third-string the game attracted a decent crowd (61 h/c) to The Farm.

I later observed, via a couple of “social networking sites”, that I felt it had been the most one-sided 3-2 win I’d ever seen. One of these subsequently attracted 27 comments – the most feedback I’ve ever had!

Still, I stand by the view, albeit with the caveat that I got to the game about a quarter-of-an hour in and Withernsea had enjoyed the better of things up to this point.  Shortly after my arrival the visitor took the lead when Stew Guy was allowed to proceed from a position some five yards offside and finish stylishly over goalie Phil Page.

A goal against Withernsea

Another goal against Withernsea

Frosty brought the Stiffs level with a goal of real quality and quick-fire strikes from Torres and Stumo put us well in charge at the start of the second half.

"Don't Panic!"

But as chances continued to be created and missed – just after I’d observed rather too loudly that “we could get eight or nine here” – that feeling emerged that we might just pay for our profligacy.

A goal for Withernsea

Sure enough, Withernsea got a penalty for handball. Converted; 3-2, game back on! “This’ll go to penalties” I said, my earlier optimism having completely dissipated. Thankfully, it didn’t, and, despite plenty of effort, the visitors never really looked like levelling things up.

The Stiffs’ win set up a trip to Eastside Sports Ground, new name for the former Destiny Fitness Centre at Saltend (before that the BP Chemicals Sports Ground, and before that the DCL Sports Ground and going even further back has formed part of a race track, speedway track and aerodrome!). In recent years, it has been home to Hedon Rangers FC (along with Skirlaugh ARLFC and – for a short time – training base for Hull KR).

Before the cup clash the Reserves had title-chasing Wawne Ferry to contend with at the weekend. For the second year running the Hull outfit were asked to “slum it” across the Ditch due to our CML game with Phoenix taking precedence on the ground.

The Stiffs and Wawne "slum it" for a second successive season

The staggered kick-offs enabled me to venture across once the necessary formalities had been completed on the main pitch. In the twenty or so minutes I watched, we held our own with Wawne – perhaps not surprisingly – forcing the pace. But there was no end result and as half-time arrived with the teams goalless I ventured back over the Ditch, ready to see if we could claim a top five spot in the CML Premier.

"Was that you Chaz? It stinks man, even the ref's noticed!"

Back in October we’d earned a share of the spoils at Pavilion Lane thanks to Farny’s wonder-strike and Chav’s injury-time penalty. Today’s Phoenix side looked nothing like the one that had played that day as part of a one-defeat-in-fifteen-games start to the season.
Manager Daz Newson told me beforehand that his side had won through to the Final of the Rotherham Charity Cup on Thursday, after penalties, and as a result of their efforts six players had been unable to make the trip to Easington.

 

"I don't recognise any of this lot"

I’d already noticed that striker Mendy (“Sanko”) was absent (long-term injury apparently) while partner Matt Ellis is also currently sidelined. With only two games still to play, Newson admitted that his team’s priorities now lay elsewhere.

Size matters?

Not so us. With the proposed reorganisation still awaiting ratification by the FA, promotion to the Supreme Division is still officially up for grabs. And Manager Mack wants it.

Thommo goes down...penalty...one-nil

After a sluggish start the result was rarely in doubt once Chav had maintained his excellent record from the spot in the 19th minute, following a foul on Thommo six yards out that on another day would surely have seen a red card brandished.
By half-time the lead had been doubled, courtesy of Mozzer’s fine free-kick dispatched with aplomb from 20 yards.
Meanwhile, cheers from across the Ditch suggested that the Stiffs had overturned a Wawne goal early in the second half and were bound for what would be their best result of the season…only for a last gasp Ferry equaliser to thwart them.

"Where'd he come from?"

Back on the main arena and victory was assured early in the second half when the Phoenix defence remained statuesque as Farny stole in at another Moz set-piece. 

Four-Nil

Job's a good 'un

Then Man Mountain capped a fine individual display by poking home Farny’s pass in the final minute.
Refusing to allow the latest shambolic news from the KC Stadium spoil my day, a very enjoyable post-match session was enjoyed in the Neptune beer garden, courtesy of a couple of pints of Black Sheep and some convivial company.
Logging on to the CML site later that evening enhanced satisfaction at a job well done. It would now seem that a top three place is really there for the taking, following dropped points by Yorkshire Main, Dronfield and Parkhouse. But with four of the last five games away, it’s still a big ask.
Thankfully, thoughts of Saturday’s tricky long trip to Bulwell Town could be put to one side as attention tonight turned again to the Stiffs’ cup campaign.
In all its guises the Saltend venue has proved “lucky” for Easington teams (and here’s hoping that continues in view of the aforementioned SH Cup draw). However, for an hour or so tonight it looked anything but.

Could it be one of those nights?

Having fallen behind to a blatantly offside goal by former player Daz Thompson, similar to the Withernsea win the Stiffs proceeded to miss a raft of chances. Front pair Frosty and Foz probably passed up the most, with sub Pursey and centre-half Nige also culpable.
Ironically, when the equaliser came it was a touch fortunate – Frosty’s attempted cross dropping in at the back stick.
Even now we missed chances to win the game and so, as per competition rules, at the end of 90mins we went to pens.
My frustration at this was compounded by the fact I’d assured Mrs Slush that I would have our eldest daughter “back by eight”. That was no longer possible. Still, listening to her cheering as Frosty, Hodgy, Brettster and Nige all converted spot-kicks, not to mention those when Pagey made a fine save and the aforementioned Thommo struck his shot wide, made the impending bollocking on our return just about worth it.  Not sure I’ll be able to swing a trip to Long Riston for next week’s quarter-final though!  Perhaps in time...

It's Friday as I finish editing this particular post - the perfect day to listen to a bit of good ol' blue-eyed soul...

Spurred on

Saturday 16 January - Phoenix Sports & Social (home) Match postponed

On 7 April 1950 Hull City went to White Hart Lane and held runaway Second Division leaders Tottenham Hotspur to a 0-0 draw in front of just under 67,000 spectators.  In David Bond's "The India Rubber Man - The Story of Billy Bly, Hull City's Longest-Serving Player", it lists among the Spurs side the likes of Ted Ditchburn, Alf Ramsey, Bill Nicholson, Les Medley, Harry Clarke and Eddie Baily, all of whom played for England as full internationals, and Welsh international wing-half Ron Burgess.  Goalkeeper Bly was one of City's heroes that day, "a cross between a Hampstead Heath contortionist and an Olympic Games diver in saving efforts from Medley", according to renowned soccer journalist Desmond Hackett.

Almost sixty years later, on 16 January 2010, one of Bly's successors to the Tigers' numero uno jersey, Boaz Myhill, has been even more instrumental in ensuring that City remain unbeaten at "The Lane" in their top-flight history.  Against a Spurs side similarly packed with internationals, Myhill's performance was so good that local radio commentator David Burns had ran out of superlatives by the time he denied Peter Crouch an injury-time winner.  The result was enough to lift The Tigers out of the bottom three and just about enough to help me get over the fact that the weather had ensured no action for any of our three teams this weekend.

At least we had a slight change on the postponement theme – thawed snow and subsequent rainfall proving the latest insurmountable obstacle as opposed to settled snow, frost and ice. The end result, however, is the same. Another blank Saturday.

As always I put my new-found free time to good use. I got myself a Facebook account. Yes, I know, it’s sad…or, as my better half’s 21-yr-old goddaughter took great delight in telling me, “You’re an old man trying to be cool”. She’s got a point. Perhaps.

In my defence I didn’t want an account as such. I actually set up a page for Easington United as another means of ensuring messages get passed on – most of the players spend far more time on “Facey B” (as I believe the cool young things call it) than they do on the club’s official web site and not many of them are yet on Twitter (he says with a slightly superior tone in his voice!).

Unfortunately, to be able to invite “friends”, sorry, “fans” to the new EUFC page, I had to set up a personal profile. Which I did. And “pow” before I knew it I was inundated with “friends” requests from people I barely know (and some I barely like!).

Of course, to show off my new cool credentials to said wife’s goddaughter “HanBansx” I thought I’d merge these new “social networking sites” together and suddenly make myself into this kind of happening, finger-on-the-pulse bloke that…well…I can’t stand really.

Thankfully my age-old flaws with anything technical came back to haunt me and such an “integration” of sites thus far remains, er, un-integrated. I think it’ll stay that way.

In amongst the technical gubbins flowing freely around our household this past weekend (and my 6-yr-old daughter really is starting to show me a thing or two about “compootas”) my good lady and I managed to steal away for a kids-free night at The Village Hotel in Hull. It was courtesy of BP’s Annual Staff Party and while the use of the excellent pool facilities was first-rate, as was our evening meal (accompanied by a fine set from those long-time Mint regulars “The Casablanca Boys”) I’ve got to point out the real highlight came in the downstairs Village pub – courtesy of a couple of pints of “Reverend James”. At 4.5% not really a session ale (the nearby "Spitfire" pump would have served that purpose had I been propping this particular bar up for the duration) but it was the perfect way to set the tone on a cold winter’s night, as the tasting notes suggest: “Full bodied and warming, rich in palate, spicy and aromatic with a deeply satisfying finish. This premium ale has been described as having a "classic" flavour not commonly available these days”. Couldn’t have put it better myself. A lovely first new ale of 2010.

Finally, and returning to the Tigers, while it was nice to see the BBC pundits giving out some deserved praise for once in the wake of Saturday’s hard-earned point, you don’t have to dig too deep to find further evidence of their ignorance of and/or complete disinterest in the club. For example, in the version of the interview with Bo Myhill, which accompanied BBC Sport’s match report, he is asked if there might be a cheeky call going into Mr Capello after his heroics? “No, I’m happy with my Welsh heritage” answers the Wales International keeper, rather more subtly and graciously than I would have done. FFS.

Then we have Alan Green, the opinionated front-man for Five Live’s Saturday night 606 phone-in. As pointed out by Paul Cockerton on his fine “Three o’clock at Kempton” blog, this fountain of all football knowledge either doesn’t realise that Hull City is a Premier League club or that Hull is in Yorkshire. Or perhaps both. Jeez. I shouldn’t get so wound up by it all but really…

"Told You So"

Saturday 26 September - South Normanton Athletic (home) Won 2-1
Saturday 3 October - Phoenix Sports & Social Club (away) Drew 2-2
Saturday 10 October - Reckitts AFC, ER Senior Cup Round 1 (away) Lost 1-4
Reserves revival; Casuals crash!

Ah, it was to be expected I suppose. As soon as we went head-to-head for the first time with a team from the Humber Premier League it was perhaps predictable that those wishing to seize on the result as some sort of statement regarding the respective merits of both competitions would do just that.
And so, having been convincingly beaten at Reckitts on Saturday in the East Riding Senior Cup, to some "observers" the result is a clear indicator that the Humber Prem MUST be superior to the Central Midlands League; or at least to the CML Premier Division (given Westella & Willerby's 5-1 win over HPL Hedon Rangers in the same competition?).
Of course drawing any such conclusions from a couple of one-off games is absolute tosh. For a start Reckitts currently head the HPL table and on their day are capable of dishing out a good hiding to most if not all their fellow member clubs. But such comparisons serve no purpose anyway. Indeed they completely miss the point of exactly why we left the HPL in the first place.
The main reason clubs like Westella, Hutton Cranswick and Easington "jumped ship", as HPL Committee member and Reckitts boss Dave Start agreed on Saturday, was to play our football in what we see as being a better environment for "progressive clubs". And so far I think our move has been more than vindicated.
Facilities-wise we have had no complaints. All four grounds so far visited have been above or on a par with all but a very few of those available in the HPL. Ditto the set-up in terms of the actual clubs, while overall the standard of football has just about been equal to the HPL Premier Division. Indeed, on the evidence of our matches against the likes of Parkhouse, Church Warsop and Phoenix, all three would give any of the HPL's established "big three" (Reckitts, Chalk Lane and Sculcoates) a game.
Phoenix Sports & Social Club provided the opponents for one of the two Central Midlands League matches completed since my last post; the other was at home to South Normanton Athletic.

Fellow newcomers South Normanton came to us on 26th September in conditions more akin to pre-season. It was an absolute belter of a day. The Derbyshire side arrived on team coach and kitted out in white shirt and club tie; very smart and befitting a club resurrected from the ashes of one that played Northern Counties East League football as recently as 2007/08.
We won the game 2-1, although most of those present in the 51-strong crowd (including "Hopper" Harvey Harris whose current projects also include setting up a database of all players to have featured in the Northern League since the late-Sixties!) agreed we "got out of gaol".


Trailing 0-1 and having been second-best for most of the game, we turned things round with two goals inside a minute, the first from the most unlikely source - goalkeeper Charlie Holden's punt (pictured above). And with the visitors still reeling from this bizarre effort, Frosty nipped in to score number two (below) and win us the game.
The result proved extra significant given that it completed a long-overdue "East End Hat-trick". For the first time since October 2003, all three Easington teams playing on the same day managed to secure victories. I was particularly pleased for the Stiffs who had gone to reigning champions Howden on the back of a 10-0 drubbing in Goole the week before. Their 3-2 win at Ashes Park was therefore as needed as it was impressive. And the Casuals too were in need of a pick-me-up after a poor start - they got it via a win in Eastrington.
Unfortunately, despite a decent looking curry on offer in The Neptune afterwards and a more than satisfying couple of pints of Tetley Cask, the rest of the day brought only disappointment sporting-wise; courtesy of City's 6-1 thumping at Anfield and Rovers' exit from the Super League Play-Offs at the hands of Wigan. Ah well, there was always Ola's latest "non-costume" to ogle at on "Strictly..."
The following week we boarded the Riding School Fun Bus bound for Brinsworth, near Rotherham, home to unbeaten second-placed club Phoenix Sports. Conditions this day were very "Autumnal", with the strong and blustery wind threatening to make a mockery of proceedings on the exposed Pavilion Lane pitch.
The football pitch is tagged onto the side of what I imagine on a nice summer's afternoon would be a very picturesque cricket ground. The pavilion nestles nicely alongside the Sports & Social Club from which the team takes it name - a Cask Marque home, more of which later!
As for the football part of the ground, a homely tea hut sits yards away (but facing the opposite direction) from the spectators' shelter (above). Not the most luxurious football stand you'll ever come across but on a day like today when the wind's blowing a hooey it certainly does the job!
With Burt away negotiating the canals of north Wales on his narrow boat, camera duties were left in the hands of me and my trusty little Nikon Coolpix. Thankfully, on entering the ground I bumped into a very pleasant young lady from the Rotherham Advertiser who was there to take a team shot of our hosts. As she was intent on hanging around a bit to get some action pics, I boldly suggested she may like to send me a couple for "use at our end". And "Voila", below are the results (and better than Burt would have done I might say!!??)...

As to the game itself, the first half proved largely "formless" as I believe seasoned hacks term it. The main point of concern to us was a nasty looking injury to Thommo which forced him off after barely half an hour.

Above a happy, smiling bench...below a not-so-happy one. Nice swelling Thommo!

We had been advised beforehand that in dreadlocked striker Ebrima Mendy, the hosts possess possibly the best player in the division. And, true to form, having managed to contain him for the most part, he popped up on the hour to produce a piece of clinical finishing. Thankfully, by then we'd already got our noses in front courtesy of a stunning strike from Farny but when Phoenix were awarded a "soft" looking penalty just four minutes from time, duly converted, it appeared the turnaround was complete.
Not so as in the fifth minute of injury-time defender Dave Porter inexplicably elbowed the ball to safety (even though the shot looked to be going wide) giving "Chav" the chance to salvage us a point. "He takes a great penalty" said Manager Mack ahead of the kick. "Kiss of death that" thought I and the rest of the dugout. What little faith - almost the perfect penalty, high to the keeper's left right in the top corner.  2-2 and back to the clubhouse...



Ah what pleasures awaited me therein. Five (or was it six?) cask ales, including what appeared to be the resident beer, John Smiths Magnet. Of the guests, which numbered a couple of local Sheffield Brewery Co offerings, two (or was it three?) from Derby's Derventio Brewery and "Sharp's Own" (Cornwall) I opted for the latter as well as an unusual little gem, Sheffield's "Blanco Blonde". As the name suggests it was more of a lager but tasty nonetheless.
In truth I could easily have stayed for a live "Phoenix Nights" experience but driver Pete needed to be back for "X Factor" (??!!) so we boarded the Fun Bus and returned via the local "offy" with another satisfying away day behind us.
Obviously last Saturday provided no satisfaction. Even ex-East Ender Mike Nicho's view that "the only difference between the two sides was in the finishing" brought little consolation. And making it worse was the fact that the crowd at Inglemire Lane was predominantly comprised of Ezzie folk and/or supporters. Among those gathered was ex-Secretary Derek "Guv" Clubley ("I onny live round the corner") and former player Dave "Crazy Legs" Shaw accompanied by another compatriot from my old Hull City fanzine days, Finchy. I do hope when the pair make their way down to the revamped Farm for a game we'll put on a better show!
We now have four successive home games ahead of us, beginning with this week's second round tie in the League Cup, at home to Yorkshire Main, from Edlington near Doncaster. They're currently going well in the Premier Division, wherein they lie second after recovering from a recent dip in form with a 5-0 thumping of Hutton Cranswick. So it looks like being another difficult afternoon. We go into the game without our skipper - courtesy of the needless red card picked up in the last round (!!) and Owen who's again on County FA Juniors duty. Thommo and Lenny remain injured but hopefully Jamie should be back and there may well be chance for a couple of the Stiffs to shine following a welcome run of form at Reserve team level.

Last week's hard-fought cup win over Mill Lane, 3-2 from two goals down thanks to Stu Campbell's winner (above) followed victory the previous week against Beverley Town Reserves - the Stiffs' second in as many weeks against one of last season's top two. Long may the run continue.
As for the Casuals, their trip to York side Heslington in the cup showed up all that is good about Easington football. For although beaten 14-0 by a team almost four divisions above them, they never threw the towel in and then rounded off the trip with the time-honoured post-match "sesh" courtesy of the Fun Bus stop-off in Mkt Weighton.

"Win or lose we'll have a booze"!