Look what you could've had!

Saturday 13th November - Parkhouse (League Cup, away) Drew 2-2
Easington Utd Reserves 5 AFC Woodlands 9
Easington Utd Casuals 0 Long Riston 3rds 7

There's particular cruelty in the fact that the first two CML away matches I have missed this season have both been accompanied by post-match venues selling some of the finest cask ales.  It leads me to think I'm paying for past misdemeanours.

For the Whatton game it was a friend's 40th birthday bash that prevented my attendance.  So what did I do on this latest occasion as an alternative to enjoying the delights of traditional beers in the convivial atmosphere typical of an Easington post-match session?  Well, I witnessed an amazing game at Low Farm that yielded 14 goals.  Not a bad substitute you might think...except that nine of them were in the wrong net!  And when I retired to the Marquis of Granby to soothe my disappointment at the result...there was no cask on.

I'd known for some time that the trip to Parkhouse was a no-go.  It happened to fall on the weekend chosen by  Mrs Slush and a friend for their annual "Abandon The Kids" weekend, otherwise known as a pre-Christmas shopping trip to Sheffield Meadowhall with overnight stay thrown in.
Of course, I didn't know this at the time she chose this particular date, which being back in late-September offered no clues as to our designated opponents.  When asked, "13th or 27th November?", I replied, "Any. The fixtures aren't out yet so I'll just have to sort things out for whichever you choose".  
I wish she'd opted for the 27th! 
It was somewhat cruelly predictable then that the Parkhouse cup-tie, eagerly awaited ever since it was drawn (mainly by me because of what I knew would be on offer afterwards) would be scheduled for the one Saturday in the month I couldn't go.  Bugger! To make matters worse, it turned out to be the only away game originally scheduled for the whole month.  Double Bugger!

Of course it wasn't just the potential beverages on offer that had had me looking forward to the trip to Clay Cross.  The manner of our win over Brimington the previous week had seen us produce - albeit in patches - some of our best football for a long time.  Therefore, I'd been on something of a high afterwards and couldn't wait for the next game to come along. 
It's peculiar how one sporting result can suddenly transform a weekend.  Nothing seems too much of a chore, nobody can rub you up the wrong way and even the blandest television programme can suddenly appear to become hugely entertaining.
Which brings me nicely to the X-Factor.  Having purposely avoided it the previous night (see Brimington blog) I actually made a point of watching the Sunday re-run.  I'd heard from Mrs Slush that highly-rated contestant Matt had done a pretty good version of one of my favourite songs of all time, Roberta Flack's "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face".  Had I watched and listened to it following the recent home defeats by Malet or Thoresby, I'd have undoubtedly been in a mood to argue this point.  As it was, I found it very, very good.  Is my judgement of what counts as quality music waning? Possibly, but we had just won 4-0 at home!  

I'd gone to bed on Sunday a very contented man but over the course of the next few days, the sudden realisation that I was missing a return trip to the CML's Hospitality Award winners of 2009/10 prompted something of a comedown.

And as the week progressed this sombre mood was only accentuated by the annual Remembrance commemorations, rumours of the impending collapse of both the England 2018 World Cup bid and the proposed Hull City takeover deal, the lack of any Orange phone signal in Easington and, of course, the passing of a television legend...

There's a bit of Jack the lad in all of us...isn't there?

For anyone like me who has watched events on "the Nation's favourite street" since the Seventies, Jack Duckworth was the type of character many of us would aspire to.   As  described by Russ Litten in this excellent piece in The Sabotage Times, Jack was "a saucy layabout who got by with minimum effort and maximum style". Who wouldn't want to emulate that?
In typical Coronation Street fashion, his departure was dragged out over a few weeks, with his final moments and subsequent funeral both being enough to bring  tears to the eyes of certain members of the Slush family household (though I'm hoping Mrs Slush didn't notice!).

And the soundtrack to his passing was particularly apt for the one-time would-be club crooner.

Of course Jack's fictional demise was followed by several commemorations of those lives lost in very real circumstances.  It's one of the Royal British Legion's major successes that the actual eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month (i.e. Armistice Day) is now marked as significantly as the more traditional Remembrance Sunday.  Long may this be so.
Amid such melancholy, I was thankful for the Black & Amber charger that is Hull City arriving to the rescue when least expected; courtesy of a morale-reviving draw at "big club" Leeds (a result that included this John Bostock screamer) and a job well done at fellow strugglers Preston.

Sorry, did I say "fellow strugglers"?  The Tigers were only 6pts off the play-offs following goals from Garcia and Barmby at Deepdale and with news of the apparent completion of the Allams' takeover ending the week on a high, the future for the newly-dubbed "Tomb Ar-my" looked a whole lot brighter.

Away from football, the week at work passed by with little of note although the radio still provided several reasons to rant (particularly that Clare Solomon woman who by my reckoning was given far too much air time to spout shite) and rejoice - mainly thanks to Radio Humberside's Armistice Day's Golden Year  part 2, which came from 1986...

Along with the above classic, the November chart of twenty-four years ago also included Madonna's True Blue, The Final Countdown by Europe  and the Top Gun-soundtrack Number One from Berlin.  And thus for half-an-hour I was back to a time when Friday nights began with The Tube and ended with a late night extravaganza called, if my memory serves me correctly, Music Box's Power Hour, on Yorkshire TV.  It was fronted by a very attractive young thing called Amanda Redington and some guy with long, permed hair, Dante perhaps?  If I had the time I'd Google it...

In-between these televisual delights, Friday evenings meant a tour of the rural Holderness pubs, all which served as the Hors d'oeuvre to the following day's main event., which began at  lunchtime in  The Trog Bar on Hull's George Street.  From there it was to The Hull Cheese where a Richardson's cab would arrive just in time to get us to Boothferry Park for ninety minutes of largely uninspiring (old) Second Division football.  At the game's conclusion it was back into town for a half-five start in Star of the West and a subsequent crawl that would usually include Masters Bar, White Horse, Cheese (again), Dram Shop, Trog (again) and Queens (now Pozition Nightclub) for last orders, before completion of the night came at the legendary Spiders Nightclub down Cleveland Street.  Ah, the memories!  Not that Radio Humberside's David Reeves probably had any of this in mind when he chose that afternoon's particular track-listing.  But thanks all the same.

A friendly affair at Mill Lane...

But back to the football where, despite my absence(!?) the lads backed-up their Brimington result with a hard-earned but deserved draw at their Supreme Division hosts in the league cup.

...but a feisty one at The Farm

While Burt and his not-so-steady camera lens were at Clay Cross, capturing as best he could the drama unfolding for the senior squad, I was at Low Farm - armed only with my  equally unsteady Nikon Coolpix...oh, and the Younger Slushette.

The Reserves own league cup tie, at home to Goole side AFC Woodlands, proved to be a  remarkable - and at times feisty - affair.  It started well enough.  Despite fielding a team ravaged by injury, illness and absence, Kev's second-string  racied into a two-goal lead inside twenty minutes, leaving their opponents to turn the air as blue as the sky.

Buoyed by the scoreline but wary of just what my 4-year-old may be picking up in terms of new words to greet her mother with on her return, I crossed over to the Pitch Across The Ditch where, unfortunately, the Casuals - fresh from a shock first league defeat of the season at bottom club Brandesburton - were already two down at home to leaders Long Riston.

One for the purists across the Ditch!

I stayed for the best part of quarter of an hour before deciding that the better contest lay back over the bridge.  I wasn't wrong - the Casuals eventually lost seven-nil.

Unfortunately I got back just after Woodlands had reduced arrears from the penalty spot.  It was a contentious decision according to spectator Brian, that's Brian Appleyard, father of Kev Appleyard, the player-manager...so perhaps not the most impartial opinion on the matter?!

Still, a defensive mix-up early in the second half allowed the Stumo to restore the Stiffs' two-goal cushion.  3-1, looking good and when news came through of Andy Martin's opener at Parkhouse, a double celebration was on the cards.  I should have known better...

'Handy Andy' Mark One at Parkhouse

Within quarter of an hour the Goolesters had turned the game completely on its head to lead 4-3.  Meanwhile Burt's unique texting method informed me, first "1.1" and then "2.1", that things had also changed in Derbyshire.  Almost pre-empting fate I replied "to them?" "Yes" came the answer.  The day had suddenly taken a turn for the worse.

But following Easington United is rarely boring.  With the seconds ticking away at the Farm, the Stiffs won a penalty.  Up stepped Karl Hodgson to coolly slam the ball into the corner.  Extra-time.

Better followed as a fine move inside the opening five culminated in Fozzy's thunderous strike from 25 yards for 5-4.  And no sooner had I finished celebrating that goal than the phone rang: "Two-all, Andy with a header from a free-kick".  Get in there!

 

'Handy Andy' Mark Two...captured in Burt's inimitable style!

While confirmation of a hard-fought draw for the First Team - and subsequent replay at the Farm - duly followed, the Reserves' hopes of progress floundered thanks to tired limbs, lack of resources and a visiting side that knew how to take its chances.  5-9 is a scoreline I feel I'm safe in predicting won't be repeated at Low Farm for some time.  Then again...

Of course, while missing out on the actual game at Parkhouse was bad enough, not being able to enjoy the post-match hospitality in The Woodthorpe Inn was a crushing blow!  And didn't Burt and the lads make sure I knew it...

...Bastards!

Thanks to Burt for the Parkhouse snaps

If there's just one tune you play today...

It must be this one. 
Sunday 14th November. Lest we forget.

I took both my daughters to the village war memorial this morning to mark Remembrance Sunday with a healthy turnout of fellow Ezzies.  

Easington's memorial is a fairly basic but still aesthetic affair.  According to the War Memorials Trust it's one of "an estimated one hundred thousand" in the United Kingdom of Great Britain & Northern Ireland.  Sadly, for whatever reason, it is not listed on the Royal British Legion's Roll of Honour list of Yorkshire War Memorials.
It's quite awe-inspiring to think that the scene in front of my eyes this morning was being replicated up and down the length and breadth of our fair isles, as indeed it was when the eleventh hour struck on Thursday (Armistice Day).  Proof that we will never forget.
It was the Younger Slushette's first such occasion (she slept through last year's anniversary at the Cenotaph in Hull) and she behaved impeccably.

Next year I shall regale her with tales of what her great-grandads did in "the War".  I bet she can't wait...

One in a hundred-thousand

Now that's more like it!

Saturday 6th November - FC Brimington (home) Won 4-0

A Flying Thommohawk!

Oh that's been so long coming. Yes I know Brimington have got problems at the moment - manager gone, lengthy injury list, reluctance to travel - and I know it wasn't a complete performance by any means - we still allowed our concentration to slip at what could have been crucial times - but by 'eck it wasn't half good to see us pass the ball as we can (at times), play with a smile on our faces (at times) and score some cracking goals in the process.  And it provided a fine end to another interesting week.

 

To add further complications to my normal ethic of trying not to let work interfere with my social life, not only did I have the obligatory match programme to produce ahead of FCB's visit but "Design Guru" Andy's work commitments in Holland meant that it would be a Friday night turnaround (i.e. we would have about four hours max to layout, proof read, touch-up and finalise...and Friday was "Bonfeer Neet"!)
In addition, I also had the delayed management meeting, taking place on the Wednesday, while at work there was the long-awaited office move.  It was shaping up to be a hectic week.

One of the biggest concerns for over our office move was the loss of internet radio facility (such luxuries/distractions are frowned upon by certain bodies within the terminal).  Although, given the topics dominating Five Live's news over the early part of the week, to deprive us of it might have been a godsend; it was enough to prompt one of the station's listeners to text: "We're joining forces with the French, prisoners are getting the vote and two women want to marry each other. I'm off back to bed!"  Quite.

 

Thankfully, the nature of our new abode has allowed us to continue to keep up with world events, enjoy quality (and not such quality) music and of course cricket matches from around the world.  Along with Twitter it also gives me plenty of scope to rant on topics as diverse as FIFA's approach to corruption within their own body, David Reeves' choice of tracks on his local radio "Golden Years" and  Polly Toynbee's views on...well, just about anything really!
Such things really help the working day go by just that little bit quicker.

I trust this won't be the only First Team pic we ever see with Pagey on it!

Wednesday night brought me to our much-anticipated management meeting  (held at The Haven Arms) at which we discussed a whole manner of things felt to be currently  undermining the running of the club.  Such small, informal gatherings usually bring about honest talk and this proved the case with some salient points being raised.  I returned home feeling the three hours had proved very productive...and the beer of choice (Vale Brewery Co. Best Bitter) wasn't half bad either.

He can't...

He can...

He has!

In almost a role reversal of recent trends, Dave had assembled a decent looking squad for Saturday's home game while Reserves boss Kev was looking at a glut of absentees for his team's East Riding Senior Country Cup trip to holders Riccall United.

Thankfully, matters were eased somewhat by Howden AFC 4ths' resignation from the County League on Thursday.  This meant that the Casuals' scheduled game in Division 5 was now off and therefore more players would be freed up should Kev require them.  It also meant that the Casuals had gone back up to third, with all their main rivals having points taken off them as Howden's six defeats to date were all expunged.  "Nowt to this management lark" posted Casuals boss Maccer, which given his side's defeat to bottom club Brandesburton and the lengthy debate he'd prompted at the previous night's meeting made me smile...a lot!

Thursday also brought the local "tradition" of Mischief Night.  We escaped unscathed (perhaps the weather put them off coming up this far) and the following night saw a Slush family outing to the fireworks display at Skeffling (already blogged).

Our Romanian goalkeeper

And so to match day.  I must admit I never fail to be in a good mood on a Saturday morning in the football season (well, almost never!).  There's just something about it, the anticipation of what's to follow that afternoon.  Even when it's "daft o'clock", pitch black and I've got to sort the Slushettes out before heading off to work to run off 60 match programmes.
Although I've read and re-read the publication umpteen times before it goes to print, I still enjoy browsing through the first completed issue to come off the copier that morning.  I allowed myself a smile when glancing at FC Brimington's squad list on the back - it's one of the few that compares with ours in terms of numbers (most teams opting just to send the names of the 14-16 players likely to be involved).
I've touched on the origins of the visitors in a previous post.  However, after a first season of what can perhaps be termed under-achievement (final placing 6th) they happen to look a better bet for promotion this term.
Or rather they did until a recent hiccup in form, which has seen three defeats, numerous injuries and the loss of chairman/manager Cliff Thomas from his matchday role due to other commitments has upset the applecart slightly.  Still, we aren't exactly pulling up any trees this term.  We would be treating our opponents with the utmost respect...

 

This particular Saturday I also had the added responsibility of the Elder Slushette's Dance Class to contend with for the first time since the "new term" commenced.  I shouldn't complain...but usually do.  Mrs Slush takes the Elder Slushette to swimming & Brownies on Monday, football training (oh yes!) on Tuesday and now a junior Youth Club on a Wednesday.  Suppose I ought to show a bit of willing by helping out at the weekends!

 



Two Nil on two cameras



The knock-on effect of this added activity on the Slush Soccer Saturday timetable was a trip down to the ground straight from my "early shift" in the office to put out the afternoon's strip, balls, bottles etc.  I was finishing up just as Groundsman Brim - and this weekend's appointed assistant, wife Carol - rolled up, ready to sort out the necessary ropes and stakes.  I'm pretty certain Brim would have liked to know the day's team news.  But I didn't really have time and Carol ensured he didn't either - "Don't stop talking, let's be on, I've got Coffee Morning at ten."  Ooh, it's  a hive of activity is Esinton on a Setherday morning!

Synchronised camerawork on the third goal

I enjoyed that!

And so did Man Mountain!

Matchday at the Farm, you can't beat it...especially when you win. Of course not everybody enjoyed the day.  Poor old Pagey's first team debut lasted all of 2 minutes (well, five then if you include the time it actually take for him to leave the field).  A broken finger sustained in Brimington's first attack curtailed the chance for him to shine and thus ensure Chaz's wait to come back lasts longer than just one game!
With Frosty (aka "the Romanian refugee" as one observer somewhat acidly described him) donning the gloves I'll admit to having a slight sense of apprehension.  Not only was I not sure of the sub's goalkeeping pedigree but I was worried we would miss the pace and goal threat he could bring outfield.  I needn't have worried.  It was his opposite number, Adam Valente, who would be by far the busier...and come up with the vital error.
There looked to be little threat when Mozzer let fly from 25 yards but sonehow Valente got his angles all wrong and the ball ended up in the net.  17 minutes gone and one up, just what we needed.  By the break it would be three.
Andy M headed the second from a Chav free-kick before Man Mountain made it 3-0, applying the finishing touch after Valente had beaten out Chav's initial shot.

Thommo lets fly...

But this time Valente's equal to it

Before the break the FCB keeper would go some way to restoring his reputation with a full-length stop to deny Thommo from 30 yards.
Our number nine should have done better with another chance presented moments afterwards but he was then in the right place at the right time to convert Andy M's cross-come-shot 6 minutes into the second half.  Four up, game won.

The coup de grace!

If Saturday mornings are enjoyable, Saturday evenings on the back of a win are even more so.  And this being Bonfire weekend it meant only one thing - a family gathering at  the In-Laws.  And an excellent one at that.  We had fireworks (which really pleased the Younger Slushette!), we had fodder (courtesy of the finest meat pies from Jones The Butcher and even finer homemade fruit pies) and we had fun (thanks in part to a previously unseen episode of Dad's Army featuring another Jones The Butcher?!).  Throw in a little alocohol and some convivial chat and there was enough light-heartedness around to ensure that even news of another barren afternoon for The Tigers couldn't spoil things.

All-in-all the day had acted as the perfect send-off ahead of my impending two weeks away from the First Team scene... 
Oh, and as you might gather, I'm on a bit of an electro trip at the moment.  Enjoy!

Thanks to Colin & Burt for the photographs; 

check out: http://www.cbphotos.co.uk/6_nov_eufc_1st_111.html

For today...

For those who died
by Ted Harben

If pale at the concrete centre of town
There stood on Remembrance Day,
A soldier in blood-stained battle-dress
With a tin, and a poppy tray,
Could you hurry by with head held high
With never a glance his way
At his wounded side, his hands, his feet
And his face a ghastly grey?

Could you close your eyes to the sickly sight
Of a Lazarus prised from the grave?
One who had trudged through the gates of Hell,
To be counted a soldier brave?

The ghost of a man, with a rattling can,
Long ago destined to die,
And his own rich blood, the flowers of love,
On offer for you to buy

Could you look him straight and meanly state;
'I'm sorry I have no change'?
Or search your purse for the smallest coin,
And for this a poppy exchange;
Pretend that you had not noticed him there?
Pass by on the other side?
And ignore the rebuke of his ghostly cry:
'It was for you - I died'?


Copyright © Ted Harben 2010
Taken from www.thisisull.com/poetry

Well that went wi' a Bang!

"Bonfeer Neet" in Skeffling - a time to catch up

"Ah's bin ti Skeff fer Bonfeer Neet" would perhaps be a more appropriate way of telling you about my whereabouts on the annual commemoration of Guy Fawkes' failed attempt to blow up the Houses of Parliament in 1605.

For in this quaint little corner of south east Holderness, the village of Skeffling, it's good to know that East Riding folk speak like East Riding folk should speak!

We chose "Skeff" as our Bonfire Night destination due to the village's reputation for doing things like this well.  As it proclaims on its excellent website,  "there is a strong sense of community spirit" and it shows.

It's often said that you don't appreciate the places nearest to you.  And that's certainly the case with me and the villages in close proximity to Easington.  So, back in May (Spring Bank Holiday Monday to be precise) we'd enjoyed a family jaunt in "Skeff", beginning with the Hodgson's Fields walk, set up by the Yorkshire Wildlife Trust in 2002 and named after local farmer (& character) Tom Hodgson.
 It's the sort of thing the Slushettes love to do; getting out in the middle of nowhere where they can let their imagination run wild.  As an added bonus, you'll be lucky to see another soul on this particular stroll.

After we'd completed the circular route, we had a drive up to the Humber Bank before stopping off at the St Helen's Church.

Prior to it being deemed unsafe to use, this 15th century building annually provided one of the year's Christmas highlights courtesy of its Carols By Candlelight.  It's also the place where the Younger Slushette was Christened.

Skeffling is writ large in my background.  Many of my late mother's family originate from there and many of them are also buried there, including both her parents; Grandad' Douglas's grave there being recorded in the Commonwealth War Graves Commission database.

Mum was one of Maggie's ten children, of which sadly only three remain - all boys.  The six girls - Elsie, Gladys, Monica, Jean, Kathy and Mary (mum) - plus one of the lads, John ("Jack"), are no longer with us.  Of the three who do, Ted still resides in Skeffling and was there to see the fireworks tonight.  T'others, Frank and Pete, both live in Easington (or Esinton if you please!) with Frank still a regular at Low Farm.

Mum's family have a strong connection with local football.  Ted, Jack and Frank all played for the Skeffling team of the late 40s/early 50s  (now there's an idea for a blog) and all went on to play for Easington once the former club had folded.  The connections carried on through many of the ten Douglas children's offspring and in turn their children too.

Ted - a footballing Douglas

Ted is a case in point, with younger son Melvin forever associated with 'The Eastenders', not only for his then record tally of 294 goals in 286 appearances, but for the fact that he died shortly after having been taken ill during a league game in the club's first ever divisional title-winning season of 1990/91; a campaign I'm revisiting in this season's match programmes.  Melv was just 30 years old.

Older brother Keith ("Kite") was also a stalwart of the club and was at the Fireworks tonight, as another of the Douglas clan offspring, Allan Atkinson (son of Elsie).  One of many players whose contribution to the cause has been diminished due to a lack of official records pre-1972, goalkeeper "Acky" still has some 256 appearances recorded from that date up until his final appearance, at Hessle Rangers on 24 October 1988.  The fact that he was United's keeper for much of the Sixties would suggest that his final figure could be up there with current record holders McNaught and Clarke.

The Ack in the Hat at Burton Pidsea circa '66/67

Up until a few years ago Acky would be found at Low Farm on match days in a spectator capacity,  usually accompanied by his German Shepherd.  On one memorable occasion when a visiting goalkeeper took exception to a comment he'd made and wanted to pursue the matter further, that same German Shepherd ensured he'd think again!  Perhaps it's as well that he now feels he "gets too wound up by referees" to venture down to the Farm these days.

The club's progress over the past few years means we often lose sight of those who plied their wares at Low Farm in somewhat less auspicious times.  Meanwhile, I  know I don't see enough of those who I really ought to catch up with.  It shouldn't come to events like Bonfire Night to enable the addressing of both shortcomings!

Having come back round to the date in question and of course the Gunpowder Plot has its own Holderness connection, given that two of Fawkes' co-conspirators, John (Jack) and Christopher (Kit) Wright, were born in the nearby village of Welwick.

As for the fireworks this evening, they were very impressive.  Given that I was someone whose Dad only had to threaten him with a cap gun to get immediate obedience when young that's quite some statement!  On tonight's evidence, the Younger Slushette's taking after me ("Can we go inside Dad, they're too loud?").  And despite the damp conditions, a healthy-sized crowd, made up of Skefflingites plus interlopers from east and west, enjoyed the display, the barbecue and the beverages on offer in the nearby Village Hall.  Word has it some were still there at two in the morning...some five hours after the last rocket had taken flight.

Yep, they know how to put on a do in Skeff!

Up then down again

Saturday 23rd October - Kiveton Park (away) Won 2-0
Saturday 30th October - Thoresby CW (home) Lost 1-2

Happy bloody Halloween!

At 4.30pm on Saturday the picture surrounding Easington United Association Football Club was beginning to look a whole lot brighter.

Following a morale-restoring win at Kiveton Park, we were looking likely to record back-to-back successes thanks to Mozzer's 45th minute strike at Low Farm.
But then lively looking Thoresby striker Gavin King went down in the box - albeit a tad too easily for my liking - and referee Stephen Hall from New Ollerton pointed to the spot.  King duly stepped up to equalise.
That came with ten minutes remaining.  King was off the field seven minutes later, dispatched for two yellow cards in double-quick time, but his would be the team that went on to win it thanks to Matt Worthington's strike, following a horrendous last minute error from Eastenders skipper Andy G.
Cue another bout of navel gazing from this Blog perhaps?  Not really.  Life's too short.  Despite protests to the contrary, football is just a game and many more important things will happen in the days between 4.41pm last Saturday afternoon and 2pm this. 
But it's still so BLOODY FRUSTRATING!

I'd spent the days immediately after the South Normanton debacle talking with our chairman, vice-chairman and reserve team manager to gauge opinion on what was currently going wrong in terms of the season as a whole and, more specifically, the shortfall in players for the First Team.  
There were some very honest and quite forthright opinions being aired, with plenty of topics for discussion for the Team Managers' meeting, which had had to be postponed for another week (but should have taken place by the time you read this).
As previously described, hopes of lightening my mood by taking in Hull City's midweek game against Sheffield United proved shortlived.  But at least by Thursday, it appeared that Dave would have a full 14-man squad available for the trip to Kiveton Park.  What's more it looked a strong one.
Therefore I was far more upbeat that evening as I ventured to the local Primary school to pick up Mrs Slush and the Slushettes from the Half-Term disco.  This was the younger Slushette's first such soiree but as a veteran now of Butlins, she's no longer a shrinking violet when it comes to the dancefloor.  Thus I arrived to find her "giving it large" to Tommy Sparks.  Ah, just like her Dad I thought...giving it large that is, not necessarily to Tommy Sparks you understand. 
For a moment I was transported back to Easington Youth Club circa 1977-79, and everbody "boogying" along to the gorgeous Baccara before Big Al Douglas, spinning the wax, interjects: "Now one for you punk rockers, it's Darts and 'Daddy Cool'..." (you must remember this was a rural village in the back of beyond where the height of fashion was a denim waistcoat with Status Quo emblazoned across the back). 
The Elder Slushette also fancies herself as a bit of a mover & shaker (it's all these dance classes she's going to).  And both girls were still going strong when the call came to "Evacuate The Dancefloor".  Of course being primary school age there was  no end of night smoochie - they'll have plenty of chance for these in later years.  
Not that I made the most of mine in those halcyon days of the late-70s/early-80s.  I can still feel the pain of Bryan and co. crooning away  with me sat alone in a darkened corner thinking of what might have been...but now's not the time to expand on this.   I digress.    



Thursday became Friday, Friday became Saturday and almost amazingly we still had the same 14 names fully accounted for as I joined The Pistol and Burt in the front of the Riding School Express.  We were only seven minutes late setting off - things were looking up.
I knew it was going too well. 
The phone rang. 
Manager Mack: "Just to keep you up to speed, Frosty's rung me.  He's pissed - says someone spiked his drinks last night.  He's asked me what to do, I've told him still to come but to drink lots of water."
As we pulled up outside The Hildyard Arms in Patrington, sure enough there was the player in question, looking decidedly ropey.  But Mack had asked me not to make a big thing of it. So I said nothing.
The Pistol made his usual good time in getting through the various pick-up points and we were on our way out of Hull at just past half-twelve.  At a quarter to two we were heading down Hard Lane, home of Kiveton Park AFC.

View from a stand...of sorts

I would suspect that there aren't many grounds in the Central Midlands League that don't have a problem with vandals.  Certainly the three clubs we visited in October (Bentley Colliery, South Normanton and Kiveton) had all previously told us of their ongoing struggles.  But within this trio, Kiveton's challenge would appear to be the stiffest.

Avid readers of this blog (as if?!) will already know I enjoyed last season's trip to the aptly named Hard Lane immensely.  You will also know how much I respect any club that has to fight as hard as they do to keep things going.

A measure of how tough the current Kivo committee are finding things was immediately evident when Pistol Pete brought the Riding School Express to a halt at the ground just over an hour before kick-off.  The first sight to confront us was one of several sheets of anti-vandal spike-topped steel fencing laying in a pile awaiting erection.  After years of trying every other method to beat the mindless idiots intent on destroying what still remains of a once proud football ground, it had come to this.

In the eight months since our last visit, the dugouts have disappeared (demolished before they fell down according to their chairman), the toilets remain far from inviting and the amount of rubbish strewn around the whole site is enough to almost warrant an episode of Grimebusters.  It's certainly a far cry from the other Lane visited the previous week.  The problems that Kiveton are currently experiencing go some way to putting ours into context. But personnel-wise they remain one of the most hospitable clubs in the competition.

And thankfully, on the field this was to be a day when things just about went without a hitch.

Is it?

It is you know!

Andy Martin volleyed us into a 14th minute lead which we held up to half-time - though not without an alarm or two!

"Caveman" Fisk came to the rescue with one excellent diving block, Chaz saved a couple, they missed a couple and when they did get the ball in the net it was thanks to the use of a hand.
Meanwhile, on the counter Farny passed up the two best opportuinties to extend our lead.  Still, any advantage at  half-time is welcome at the moment.

Farny gets it wrong again!

I couldn't be arsed to make the long walk across to the Tea Hut at half-time, opting instead to await news from Low Farm where I'd previously been informed the Reserves had come from two down to lead 4-3 with "about ten minutes to go".  No news had been received since and it was surely all over.  Was that a good sign?  I took the plunge and dialled the number marked "Bo Mob".
Those familiar Gillingham-edged tones answered: "'Ellow".  There then followed the sort of conversation that could have formed part of any sketch by "legendary" Hull comedian Norman Collier.  I eventually ended the conversation not knowing whether we'd won 4-3 or drawn four all...or was it five apiece?!

 

Unfortunately, thanks to Man Mountain's grandad's somewhat clearer phone reception, there was no doubting the score from the KC where Pompey - supposedly on the road to immediate winding-up - were a goal to the good courtesy of Dave Nugent.  And as we restarted at Hard Lane, news filtered through of a second.  There' was going to be an even darker mood among the Tiger faithful than there was on Tuesday.
Back in our game we began positively and Farny passed up his third - and clearest - chance following fine work by Andy M.  We hoped it wouldn't prove crucial.
Clarification was finally received that the Stiffs had drawn 5-5 at The Farm, while the Casuals had bowed out of the league cup on pens following an epic tie against a team a division higher.  Glorious failure is the way we do things down the old East End of Holderness!

One Man & His Dog watch us go close again

Midway through the half Mack began making changes.  The away contingent (numbering 11 among a crowd of 18) were keenly awaiting Frosty's introduction given that he'd spent most of the game strapping adhesive bandage to his socks ("there's no tape") and across the top of his shirt, the latter spelling his name.  By now his rather inebriated state was an open secret!
In the event he was called up second, replacing Chav on 69mins.  Two minutes later he left the full-back for dead as he broke down the right wing.  There was only one option for the defender.  While the foul may or may not have occurred in or outside the box, the defender must have known the risk.  Penalty.
"F____g hell" exclaimed regular spot-taker Chav to his manager, "Why couldn't you have left me on for five more minutes?"
"Cos you wouldn't have won us that penalty" came the latter's quickfire response.
In Havercroft's absence up stepped Mozzer.  Goalkeeper Parker made things easy for him by virtually walking to his right hand post as Moz ran up to drill the ball in the opposite direction.  Two-nil and worse to follow for the hosts as centre half Rob Jones saw red for his continued protests.

Two Nil

To the hosts' credit they gave it a real go for the last twenty and Green hit the post when it really was easier to score.
On the counter Thommo should have put things beyond doubt but no matter; for the first time in four weeks we'd tasted victory.
Mozzer's pre-match pledge had been to streak round the Services on the way home should we win.  So that was something to look forward to then?  Not.
One of the highlights of the previous season's visit to Kiveton had been the cask ales on offer in the Jubilee Club in nearby Wales.  Apparently this place is no longer open and the new post-match retreat was the Lamp & Pony Bar situated inside the nearby  impressive looking Kiveton Park & Wales Village Hall.
Although the ales on offer were not of the "real" variety, the fodder was very tasty indeed, while on the telly we could watch Sheffield United getting beat by a team for who a Yorkshire derby actually meant something!
Several Strongbow were sunk on another excellent trip home with Mozzer downgrading his pledge to one of parading around the foyer of Doncaster North Services with a large "Caution - Cleaning In Progress" sign over his head, much to the amusement of the various bystanders, which included a dozen Grimsby Town fans on their way back from their FA Cup 4th Qualifying Round tie at Tamworth.
Who said anything about "Black October?"

So, it was a first attempt alright?

Half term.  Two words that send mothers across the country into fits of panic.  How many times would I hear the term, "It's easier going to work" over the next few days?  Plenty.
I'd arranged to do my bit by agreeing to take Friday off, thus ensuring we didn't have to rely on the grandparents for more than one of Mrs Slush's two days at work.
To achieve this meant I had to put in extra hours for the first four days, which at least kept me out of the house - not a bad move as every day appeared to throw up another reason for my better half to issue the aforementioned statement!
Unfortunately, my amusement at her "predicament" was balanced by a turn for the worse on the football front.  Sunday brought a text from our Tom Daley-lookalike Jamie C saying that owing to increased university commitments he would no longer be available for selection.  On Monday Farny fell off a ladder, breaking his hand.  With Frosty booked on DC's Stag Do at the weekend, we were already three down from Saturday's winning squad as we prepared to host Thoresby.
Due to Mack and son Cameron going away for half-term, it fell to Asst-Mgr Ian and me to try and make some light of the gloom.  And there was positive news.  Former skipper and asst-mgr Nige made himself available for the first time this season, Gav came out of retirement and Jim was persuaded to help out again.  Suddenly we had another decent-looking squad on board to host another of the league's inconsistent opponents.
With the above squad selection completed by Thursday, I awoke on Friday in good spirits ahead of my day with the kids.  Task one was pumpkin cutting.  Not as simple as it looks is it?  Indeed, despite the aid of a template, I took so long hacking away that the Slushettes got bored and disappeared into the play room to watch Black Beauty.  Charming.
Still, I was quite pleased with my first efforts at getting into the Halloween spirit (if there is such a thing).  I even tried my hand at pumpkin soup as a starter to Friday's tea and although it wasn't a roaring success I was quite pleased with how the day had gone. 
Orange is the most popular mobile phone provider in Easington as it's the only one that guarantees a signal.  Or rather it was prior to their merger with T-Mobile.  Now the signal is shite.  And so it was only when I was outside putting some rubbish in the bin that I received a text message sent at eleven that morning telling me that due to injury Jim wouldn't now be available for tomorrow.  Here we go again...
As it happened Mack was quite happy to name himself third sub although we did make an elventh hour attempt to get young Sam back in the frame.  To no avail.  Still, buoyed by the previous week's win and with popular faces Nige and Gav back on board, there was a mood of optimism in the camp as we approached our last home 3pm kick-off of 2010.

Having skipped through both last season's encounters with Thoresby Colliery Welfare, I'm overdue in providing a bit of background on them (courtesy of the notes sent for our match programme!).
The Club was formed in 1930, spending its early years  playing on a farmer's field in the small Nottinghamshire village of Edwinstowe before moving to their present home at Fourth Avenue, built for them by the Bolsover Coal Company, the owners of the local colliery.
They would appear to have spent much of their formative time in the Notts Alliance League, winning the Nottinghamshire Junior Cup in 1952/53 and the Notts Aliance Senior League Cup in the late 70s.  In 1980/81 they finished runners-up to Rainworth Miners Welfare in the League, missing out on the title by a solitary point.  Rainworth also prevented them from gaining consolation in the Nottinghamshire Senior Cup Final...by a solitary goal.
A period of decline saw the club relegated to Division 1 in 1999 and it was at this time that the Committee decided the best way forward was to apply for the Central Midlands League.  They were accepted in time for the 2001/02 season.  They have remained in the Premier Division ever since, a 6th place finish in 2007/08 their best to date.
Our opponents made good time up from Nottinghamshire and most were already parked up before I arrived at the ground.  It was a lovely bright, autumnal day, in direct contrast to the soggy afternoon which accompanied last season's corresponding fixture.

My main concern pre-match was that while the referee and one assistant had travelled together up from the Mansfield area, the other assistant was making his own way across the River from Scunthorpe.  "Gonna cost us a bob or two today" I thought.  I'd be proved right.
Club Sec. Judy had once again done us proud with her pre-match hospitality. I've got to say I am yet to find a ground in the CML - or any other league at  this level for that matter - where such a veritable feast of "nibbles" is laid on beforehand for visiting match and club officials.  And all home-made...well almost!
Suitably fed, watered and having enjoyed some conviviality with our opponents it was time for the action to begin on this our skipper's 350th first team appearance (and his 420th at all levels of the club) - a proud day.  For now.

Moz scores...

And it's captured by two photographers

Although we'd kicked off at three o'clock it was actually 3.45pm before we got started.  A pretty poor first half display had looked likely to yield half-time parity at 0-0 before Chav cut in from the left, beat his man to the byline and laid a goal on a plate for Mozzer.  Somehow we were one up.
The visitors could have felt somewhat aggreived to be behind.  But they couldn't have had many qualms had we then extended our lead afterwards.

No push there?

Man Mountain's in...

He must score...

And does...but look at the liner

Meanwhile from Burt's lens, Fitzy thinks he's been fouled...

Ref looks right as everyone goes up...

And it ain't gonna stand...oh, hello Colin!

Thommo should have done better when put one-on-one with the keeper and Man Mountain had the ball in the net only to be denied by a controversial late flag from the assistant, apparently for a foul by Fitzy on keeper Smith.
Mozzer headed over at a corner and we were suitably on top...or seemingly so.  Then it all went Pete Tong.
The aforementioned King had done little of note for eighty minutes aside from one glorious piece of trickery inside the box that created space for him to then smash a shot against the underside of Chaz's crossbar.  We'd survived that.  We wouldn't with ten to go.
When the striker raced into the box, pursued by Blounty as Chaz came racing out., the alarm bells were ringing.  Trouble here if Chaz timed it wrong.  He did - or so it seemed - as King went sprawling.  Penalty. 1-1.

Oooooooooooooooh, Mozzer!

Chaz protested that he'd actually made contact with Blounty but in truth, although King went down easily, there was always the likelihood of him doing so given any form of contact - real or imagined.
Some of the lads were not best pleased with the blonde frontman, especially as he threw himself to the deck again a few minutes later under pressure from the returning Nige.  This time referee Hall deemed his theatrics worthy of a yellow.
Moments later another race between Chaz and King resulted in the striker catching the keeper late - second yellow and off.
Three minutes left.  Was there a sting in the tail? Could we snatch it?  Er, yes there was and no we couldn't.

It's as if he knew!

You remember me telling you earlier about AG's milestone appearance?  Well, with just ninety seconds remaining, the skipper probably wished he could have been anywhere else than on the pitch as he was caught in possession from Chaz's short goal-kick and  Matt Worthington pounced to lash the ball in off the post from 25 yards.  Cue wild excitement among the visitors (King even proclaiming "that's worth paying a fine for" - I suspect he'll change his mind when it comes to it) and desloation for the skipper who lay prostrate with his head in his hands.
We restarted.  The final whistle blew. Defeat number five for the season was confirmed.

What every self-respecting couple in Easington are wearing this Halloween

A frsutrating day was completed with news of a first league defeat for the Casuals at bottom club Brandesburton and then a power cut that hit the village at just after 9pm, causing abandonment of the Halloween Dance in the Community Hall, arranged by the Recreation & Sports Association (of which I am a member) and which looked to have pulled a decent crowd in.  News of Kevin Kilbane's equaliser at Oakwell hardly constituted crumbs of comfort.

The Slushettes...but which one's witch?!

The following day brought a welcome respite from football troubles - if not any restoration of power until mid-afternoon - as we decamped to the Rutters' for a Halloween Party.  Nige had done us proud with a top-drawer selection of bottled ales including a superb Wonkey Donkey from Keighley's Goose Eye Brewery and some Batemans Triple XB.
And so, with the First of November it was time to say "Bye bye Black October"...at least for another year!
As for this post, I shall bid you farewell with some Halloween music from my younger years (can't imagine these ever getting played at a school disco)...

 

Thanks to Colin Brammer & Burt Graham for the pics